I’ve just signed up to host a Macmillan Coffee Morning on Friday 27th September 2024.  I love baking and scones and cakes are a particular favourite.  This is a fantastic charity which helps so many people come to terms with their cancer diagnosis.

Recently I was waiting for someone in the Macmillan Horizon Cancer Centre Car Park in Sussex.  A fabulously modern centre offering support to people living with cancer.  In the couple of hours I waited, I watched people of all ages come and go; their lives etched on their faces.  I recognise the power of addiction although I don’t really understand it.  I found it really difficult to watch people who were at the hospital for cancer treatment smoking cigarettes furiously in the car park.  I tried so hard not to judge yet I simply didn’t understand.

And I didn’t understand why a visitor to the car park who was dropping off reversed into a parking space despite the polite notice in exceptionally large letters, “Please Park Facing the Windows.”  They even got out of the car, read the request, paused and still left their car facing outwards.  Again, I tried hard not to judge.  Who knew what that driver had been going through?  Who was I to disapprove yet I felt awkward.  Maybe it was because I was somehow humbled by the place and the services provided by Macmillan without judgement?

I sensed that some visitors and their drivers were not at one with each other.  Hardly surprising given the circumstances, although so difficult to experience.  I checked my phone furiously rather than being seen to stare.  Then the most difficult challenge of my wait.  A woman came back to her car, next to mine.  She was clearly distressed.  It was a ridiculously sweltering day although I could see that her pain wasn’t just from the heat.  Or could I?  Such a difficult choice, should I offer support or not?  And what words should I use?

Miraculously I found a route in.  Was my car parked too close?  Did she have sufficient room?  Would some cold water help to cool her down?  Oh, so conscious of her need for privacy and not wishing to impose, I mumbled something about resting.  Clearly things weren’t okay although my new acquaintance wanted to chat.  Without warning she told me her story and giggled that sometimes it’s good to let off steam to someone you don’t know.  We made a connection, and she thanked me.  I can only hope that I made her day a little brighter.

Ever since my experience I’ve wondered how it would have been if I’d ignored this woman’s angst.  Was she in the best place to drive herself home and back to work?  And what alternatives were available to her?  Her husband was at work, and she needed to be at the hospital.  Living with cancer is tough for so many people of all different ages and from all walks of life.

If you can’t make it to the Coffee Morning I’m hosting although you want to sample my famous scones then please get in touch.  That probably means an excuse to catch up in person and add some funds to my sponsorship.

Please get in touch if you’d like to discuss any of the topics I’ve mentioned in this piece, Let’s chat